Thursday, November 5, 2009

First Date Hell - Wait...Who are You With?

I made the mistake of taking a woman to a bar for a first date. It didn't feel like a mistake at the time. I mean, alcohol is a social lubricant and having a few drinks is a good way to loosen up and get to know someone in a more relaxed frame of mind. The key word being a"few" drinks.

I have to mention that this is a bar that I go to often and know the owner and several of the employees. So, I can hardly go into this place unnoticed.

After a few drinks, my date begins to flirt with the bartender. At first, I thought she was trying to get my attention and make me a little jealous. When the harmless flirting wasn't getting his attention (and after even more drinks) she took it up a notch and began being more overt. She asked him what his name was and he jokingly said "Bob". His real name is Mike but she refused to believe me. I told her that I actually know this man but that didn't seem to matter to her.

A few drinks later and she was flirting to the point of vulgarity.She was leaning over the bar while yelling, "hey Bob" and rubbing her"A" cup breasts and then doing some thing with her tongue that made her look like the lead singers from Kiss. I'm telling you, this woman had no shame and probably would have had sex with him right on the bar if not for one small problem.

See, the problem is that this woman was pushing 40, had 3 kids and wasn't what you would call a perfect 10. Not even close. Now, Mike the bartender was the kind of guy who could have any woman that he wanted. He was young (around 25, I believe), charismatic, very cool and he worked at the hippest bar in town. If she had been paying more attention she may have noticed the entourage of drop dead gorgeous young women that were circling Mike like flies on a horse's ass.

After her shameless attempt at landing this man, which she thought went quite well, she excused herself to go “freshen up”. While she was gone, Mike apologized to me and told me that he was actually embarrassed for me. I seriously considered leaving cab fare and ditching her while she was in the restroom but I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

I ended up driving her home, ignoring her the entire way. When we pulled into her driveway, I didn't say a word or move at all. What seemed like an eternity went by and she wasn't getting out. I turned to tell her to exit my vehicle and I planned to use a few choice expletives but before I could even speak, she leaned in and kissed me. How could anyone possibly misread such clear body language or think that this was a date that went well?

3 comments:

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    Specially for cougars who are seeking for younger men

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lol...some people just don't seem to be able to handle their drinks...or maybe she was just too desperate? ;)
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  3. LOL. Very informative...

    do you frequent free dating sites ?

    ReplyDelete